Pascha in Ghana May 31, 2011

April 25, 2011

My Father shared this Video with me and it is so beautiful i just had to share.
Most people think of Orthodox Christians as Russian, Greek, Serbian, Polish therefore many people are shocked when they see videos such as the one below.

Orthodox Christians singing Christ is Risen in Ghana at the conclusion of the Pascha service.

I love the drums and possible a tambourine. I love how the people are Dancing and really worshiping our Risen Christ. What a Joyous feast:-)
The priest is just awesome in this video so filled with happiness.

I would LOVE to go to Ghana and worship with the Orthodox folks there.
I have to say Orthodox Christians in Ghana really get down LOL
I wonder what they do during a Sunday Divine liturgy?? I think i will search for a video of that now.

A Most Blessed Pashca May 31, 2011

April 23 and 24, 2011

Pascha 2011 was the most Blessed Pascha we have had really since our first Pascha together as husband and wife 7 years ago.
Mainly due to having Noah on Good Friday 6 years ago, being prego with Silas the next year and then my health took a turn for the worse when i develop Postpartum cardiomyapthy 4.5 years ago
.

This year I was feeling wonderful therefore I was prepared, made all the traditional Pascha food for our basket.
Eric Served and the kids were angels for me during the 3.5 hour service that started at 11:30pm.
It is the most beautiful service and I am so blessed that my children, love it, understand it and look forward to it.

It was just the most beautiful and Blessed Pascha in years!

I did not have the opportunity to take as many pics as I would have liked or as many as I normally do. With Eric serving i was preoccupied with the kids and soaking up each and every second of the service. However, I did take a few good videos and really Video is so much better when it comes to documenting a Pascha Liturgy.

Each year for the 40days before Easter we observe Great Lent in which we fast from meat. diary, oil, wine and most seafood. We also lay low meaning we do not host or attend parties and we use this time to reflect and pray.,
After the Holy Pascha midnight service each Family fills their “pascha basket” with ham, kielbasa, cheese, diary and oil products and we all go to the hall and ‘break the fast together” It is the perfect ending to a perfect middle of the night Celebration.
We usually get home around 4:30/5am just as the sun is coming up and the birds chirping. It is the most wonderful time of the year for us.

CHRIST IS RISEN!!!!
INDEED HE IS RISEN!!!

The Tomb of Christ lays in the front of the middle aisle. As each person enters the church they Venerate the tomb of Christ by doing three full prostrations and kisses the plashchanitsa

Silas looking sleepy and “Rewwy want my bed, but I like being at church in the middle of the night mama,mama rub my back please”
Silas is the sweetest little guy around:-) Zofia was her lively diva self from the minute we woke her up at 10:45pm

Noah, Silas and Zofia durning the procession at midnight.
I bought the cutest linen suits and ties for the boys and the most fabulous dress for Zofia. Sadly we did not get a portrait style pic of them on Pascha but we will be dressing them up in the Pascha outfits and having a photo shoot soon:-)

Procession at Midnight

Blessing of Baskets

Nervous May 6, 2009

Surgery is set for 3pm today. I am a nervous wreck and very emotional.
I am kicking myself for being so knowledgeable in the medical field because I know TOO much about what could go wrong especially since I have a heart condition and wacky heart/health history.

I am staying positive though knowing that I am in the Lords hands and he will protect me but I still can not help but have those unpleasant thoughts once in awhile. It does not help that I am by myself right now. Kids are at my parents and Eric is at work.
I will soon go lay down and indulge myself in some TV until it is time to go to the hospital to get my mind of all my fears.

I feel I have to just say thank you to all who read my blog and thank you to all who have prayed for me. Thank you to all my family and friends who give me the support I have needed and who have helped me so much these last two years.

To my beloved Husband Eric thank you for all you do for me and us and I love you so very much. Thank you for all your support these past two years. Without you Eric I would not be. I love you with every fiber of my being.

Noah, Silas and Zofia, you are the light of my world and I love you more then I can even express. Not having you here with me right now hurts so bad. Your innocence love and hugs is my best medicine. You keep me going and you keep me smiling. I love you guys so much and please never forget that.

So now I am off to relax before the surgery. Danielle will update my blog as things happen today so check back later if you want.

Please keep not only me in your prayers but Eric, Noah, Silas and Zofia, My parents, Brother and SIL and nephews and for Danielle and the Doctors.
Please pray that if something terrible happens that all the above people will be ok and loved and supported. I do not want to sound like a pessimist because I am not; I am just a realist today. I need to be, the more you are aware, the more you will be ok this is something i have learned along the way.

This picture was taken this past Sunday at My Father’s church. This picture is very special to me as it is taken of my whole family with ArchBishop Job who is not just our Bishop of the Midwest Diocese but is a close family friend who i have known since i was 10 years old. He is not only close with my Family but he is a big part of Eric’s life and played a role in us meeting and our journey together. He helped Eric and I along the way and was to perform our wedding along with my Father but he became ill and was not able to make it. It was very special to have him at My Fathers church and the church i grew up in for the 20 year Anniversary Of St. Joseph’s this past Sunday.
( This picture sure does not show off the 17 pounds I have lost it makes me look I gained 17 pounds…bad pic, not a flattering shirt or skirt combo:-) This is just a note to self so when I look back on this I do not cry:-))

It was also very comforting for me to be able to get the bishops blessing and have him say a special prayer over me just days before my surgery. His blessing and prayers have really comforted me.

In my heart and mind i am confident that this surgery will be a success and complication free and i will be at home enjoying my husband and kids tonite or tomm.

In the meantime i will be praying all day saying these prayers over and over today.

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior, You became man and died on the cross for our salvation. You healed people of sickness and affliction through Your love and compassion. Visit me, Lord and grant me strength to bear this sickness with which I am afflicted, with patience, submission to Your will and trust in Your loving care. I pray that You will bless the means used for my recovery and those who administer them. Grant that my sickness may be to my spiritual benefit and that I may live the rest of my life more faithfully according to Your will. For You are the source of life and healing and to You I give praise and glory, now and forever. Amen.

O Christ, Who alone art our Defender: Visit and heal Thy suffering servant Juliana delivering me from sickness and grievous pains. Raise me up that I may sing to Thee and praise Thee without ceasing, through the prayers of the Theotokos, O Thou Who alone lovest mankind

Survial mode February 14, 2009

Yesterday something happened that disturbed me very much as a mother.
The boys were TERRIBLE ALL DAY yesterday and so finally at 5.57pm exactly after the 45896 they pushed and hit Zofia I put them to bed without dinner.
They were shocked to say the least; Eric was not even home yet. They told me all about how they needed to eat dinner and put on PJ’s and watch TV with daddy first and I explained to them that they were not being good boys and bed was it end of story.

After I put them to bed I sat on the couch with Zofia and felt like the BIGGEST failure ever. Eric came home a few minutes later and I explained to him what happened. He went upstairs to talk to them and then came down and asked if I had eaten. I told him no and that his dinner was on the counter he looked at it once and said I am going to get a burrito and asked if i wanted anything. That was funny because I literally through something together and called it dinner….this has never happened. I could not even make a proper dinner because the boys were so BAD.

After we ate and I put Zofia to bed I sat and pondered about what happened today.

It was them that I began to cry and realized that I had lost control of my kids.
Last year when I was sick and prego with Zofia I entered SURVIAL MODE. I did whatever I could do to make life easy for the boys and I.
I let them run the show because I could not discipline them the right way and could not chase after them, I sometimes could not even talk to them without getting so out of breath i would have to take a break to catch my breath and by that time I had lost there attention. They were only 1.5 and 2.5 year old.
Then I went on home bedrest and then hospital bedrest for a month. There lives were changed upside down in a matter of weeks. Once I had Zofia and was home I had a nanny and other family and friends coming over everyday to help me because I was so sick and there was no structure really at all.

This summer when I felt better we were so busy making up for lost time that I did not even pay attention to how OUT OF CONTROL things had gotten.
Then I got sick again and I went into survival mode again without even realizing it. This time it was even worse because I did not have as much help as when I was prego with Zofia or after I had here. I had felt good for four months so there was no need to keep the nanny around or have friend and family over as often to help. I did not ask for help when I got sick again in October because I was too ashamed and did not want to admit that I needed help I just wanted to be better and be normal.

I went to school for child development, I worked in preschools, kindergartens and daycares, I was a nanny and I taught parents tips and tools for good parenting. How could I admit that I lost control and that I did not know what to do?
I was a pro at this yet I was failing.

Over the last several weeks I would often be weepy and sad and confused for no reason that I could think of at least, I just felt like something was off and I could not figure it out.

Finally last night it all hit me and I realized it was time that I let the boys know that mommy is better and that mommy means business and I knew no other way to gain control again.

My Survival mode became a habit or a rut if you will. It was all I knew for what felt like a really long time.

I decided I needed to make a routine for the morning and STICK TO IT. The mornings will be structured, filled with learning time, structured free play and many educational and social outings.

I will start on Monday and i know it will take time for everyone to adjust but once we do we will LOVE it and be happy.

I realize that it is not my fault but what I HAD to do to survive while my heart was giving out and I was too sick to sweep the floor. My heart failure relapse happened so quick that I never had a chance to figure out the RIGHT thing to do, I am not even sure there was a RIGHT thing to do in such a situation. You do what you have to do to survive.

I would be lying if I said I was not a little sad and teary eyed as I write this but that is just because the trauma of the last two years really hits me at moments like this the most.
In the end this is just going to bring me closer to my kids and make all of us stronger.

I know that God played a role in yesterday’s events and it was his way of WAKING ME UP.
It is times like this when I realize how important my relationship with God is and how when you feel like you have lost control and it will be too herd to pick yourself up God is right there to help you.
He gave me the wisdom and strength to face my worst fear.
In my heart I have known that I lost control and I did not know where to begin to gain that control back.
Right before the final straw last night I stepped into our Icon corner by myself and said a prayer and asked God to please help me through this and to give me the strength, courage and wisdom to get in control.
I was afraid, I was embarrassed and I was just at a loss, I felt like a failure.

I am looking forward to this new routine!

If anyone has any words of wisdom or ideas or encouragement I AM OPEN to ALL them just leave a comment or e-mail me at julianameng@yahoo.com

Thanks in advance:-)

CHRIST IS BORN!!! December 24, 2008

GLORIFY HIM!!

I hope you all have a very Blessed Christmas!

She would climb a mountian for me! November 14, 2008

That would be my dear friend Danielle. The tears are already pouring out of my eyes and I have not even gotten to the real tear jerker yet:-)

Danielle has been in my life for about 3 years now and each day our friendship gets stronger and stronger. We met at St. Georges Orthodox Cathedral ( the church we attend) when I was prego with Noah. Eric and I became good Friends with Danielle and her husband just after Noah was born, so when we got prego with Silas we knew right away we wanted Danielle and Randy tobe Silas Godparents.
They are not just our friends but our Family.

When I was first Diagnosed with PPCM in Oct/Nov 06 she admitted to me that she was real freaked out by the recent turn of events. I told her not to be and that I would be just fine.

In April of 2007 when I was going to see the Heart failure docs at Loyola Danielle offered to come with me. My mom was going to come but I wanted her to watch the kids and I wanted a friend with me.
Danielle is a real go getter, she researches everything from the best sippy cups to sports towels ( I never knew there was such a thing:-) and she does not take NO for an answer so I knew she would ask the questions i did not know to ask.

Danielle has gone to most every doc appt with me the scheduled ones and the last minute ones.

She has been to my house with as little as 45min notice to watch my babes while i go to the doc or to go with me to the doc.

She has spent countless hours listening to me cry and yell in frustration and pain. She has also spent countless hours researching PPCM, heart failure, troponin leaks, etc and she was even in contact with a PPCM researcher in Wa. when I was on hospital bedrest.

I cannot even express to you how I feel about Danielle, She is not just my Best friend but she is my advocate and my #1 cheerleader. She encourages me when I need it but she also is not afraid to tell me how it is when i need a kick in the Ass. She is the first to tell me I am not overreacting and that I NEED to call my Doc or slow down or what have you.

While I also have the support of Eric, My Mom and Dad, Joy, Nichole Mamie Sheryl and many others Danielle has been the one who has walked this road the most with me.

She will do just that again in a few days when we pack up my car and our baby girls and head to Cleveland for an appt with Rhemotologist at the Cleveland Clinic. It was Danielle who called and got me this appt last week while I was at the cardio.

She is taking three days out of her week to drive 7 hours with her 1.5 year old to attend a doc appt for me. That is utterly amazing to me and I am so grateful that I am a bit speechless.

She has supported me about going to Mayo or Cleveland clinic for sometime now and while there are some people in my life who think it is silly that I am going, Danielle always reminds me that it is not silly but the RIGHT thing to do.

The Cleveland Clinic is #2 in the country for Rhemotology and the Doc i am seeing specializes in Lupus.
I have had enough of the run-around with Docs here in Chicago and since Lupus is such a hard disease to diagnoses I thought I would just go to the experts.

Pretty much whatever this doc tells me I will believe because they are that good and she would not give me a run-around when she knows I have traveled 400 miles to see her. They deal with situations like mine all the time and people come from all over the country.

So on Wednesday around noonish Danielle and I will head on our journey for Answers. We are staying at a nice hotel with lots of room and we will make this a fun trip too, stopping at all the outlets malls on the way. She is my shopping buddy too:-)

So with all that said Danielle I love you more then you could ever know and I appreciate all you do for me more then you will ever know.
Thank you for being such a Fabulous Friend and for walking this road with me every step of the way.
Thank you for not just being my Friend But Eric’s too and for loving him and my precious children so very much!
You are a true Gem!

A Joyous Pascha April 30, 2008

What a Joyous Pascha it was. The boys were great and stayed up the whole service and for the Agape meal afterward. We left church at 5am and the boys were in bed by 5.30 and slept till 10.30. We had everyone over the next day and thank you to all who came for doing EVERYTHING..i basically provided the house:-) There was no way i could have cooked or even cleaned the way i like to but everyone pulled together to help me and it was a FABULOUS DAY!
Eric always takes such fabulius pics so i had a hard time picking just a few! Enjoy!

The midnight procession around the church three times

Auntie Nichole and Noah


The Gospel reading at the entrance of the Church

CHRIST IS RISEN!
INDEED HE IS RISEN!

Auntie Nichole entertaining the kids during hour #1….thanks goodness for her:-)

Noah and Silas having a snack durining hour #2

Daddy and the boys taking a break from standing

Mommy and Zofia Adaline

Silas and his older:-) twin

Silas at about 3am

Noah at 3am…he was all smiles all night:-)

Blessing of the food baskets after church

Noah pushing his bride:-) at about 4.30am

The End!
We are still recovering:-)

May God Grant you many years Daniel December 4, 2007

This past Sunday our nephew Daniel Joseph was Baptized into the Orthodox Christian Church. Everytime my Father and Brother serve together i get tear eyed…so yesterday i was even more choked up watching my Father and Brother serving the Divine Liturgy together while Baptizing their Son and Grandson.
It was a beautiful day and he was such a good little boy!
Many blessing to you Daniel, We love you!

Grandpa Baptizing Daniel (My Father, My bro to the left the deacon)

Daniels first offering to the church, a lock of hair, such a cute littel face, he does not have much hair so pops had a hard time:)

The Matusiak/Meng Family

Christ is Risen, Indeed he is Risen April 10, 2007

Oh what a joyous Pascha it was!
This time of year is by far my favorite. We spend forty days fasting from meat, dairy, oil and wine products, attending many weekday church services, forgiving and confessing. I like to think of lent as a time for spring-cleaning but not that of the closets in our homes but of our souls, it is a time for cleaning out the closets of our soul. After the 5 weeks of lent we enter holy week and then Finally Pascha, the resurrection of Christ.
For me Pascha is like the New Year. Spending forty days pondering about the things i can change in my life and how i am going to strive to be a better wife, mother, daughter and friend. It is a time for renewal and when it is all over and Christ is risen, i feel refreshed and excited to start the new year:)
Growing up the daughter of and Orthodox priest Pascha has always been my favorite time of the year. We have so many traditions from going to church at midnight to bringing baskets filled with lots of dairy and meat, to breaking the fast with my church family. As a little girl I used to Dream about Pascha when i am married with my own family.
This year my Dream came true this Pascha was amazing Eric served, Noah was awake the entire service, i carried on traditions that my Mom and Dad instilled in me. While it is hard not being at my Father’s church, the church i grew up in and was married in. It was hard to not celebrate this joyous feast with my mom and dad and church family at St. Joes. It was nice to be at church with my family and starting our own traditions. It was so comforting to know that even though we became members of our own church, i did not loose my family at St. Joes. I feel like my parent’s and church family at St. Joes have accepted our reasons for joining a different parish and respect and understand our decisions. This has been a battle sort of since I got married. It was very confusing and unclear to many why Eric and I were not members of St. Joes. Since the birth of Silas things have really changed and my family is understanding, accepting and encouraging about our membership at St. Georges. Eric is now a member of the Parish council and I will be helping to start the Sunday school at St. Georges along with my good friend Danielle and Eric. I have a vision for St. Georges and i am so excited to take My Fathers example and put it into a church that really needs it and has longed for it. St. Georges has not had many children or young people as members in a long time. Today St. Georges has enough children to start a Sunday school………….how awesome!
Times are a changin and it is so exciting.
Today is the start of bright week and what a bright week it is already!
Christ is Risen!
Indeed he is Risen!

Noah and Grandpa at St. Joes

Noah and Grandma at St. Joes on Saturday afternoon

Noah at about 2am during pascha service at St. Georges

Blessing of Baskets at St. Georges

You know your orthodox if……………… December 26, 2006

The following was e-mailed to me today and I just thought it was great and all of you Orthodox readers would appreciate it:)1. On Wednesdays and Fridays you eat sea food
2. You are more comfortable standing in church than sitting.
3. You can suck/vacuum up the crumbs of bread out of your hand without coughing.
4. You can sing ison to any song (and you know what an ison is… LoL).
5. Lent to you means peanut butter, tofu, soy, lots and lots of pita bread and hummus, and services at least five times a week.
6. You’re used to skipping breakfast on Sundays.
7. On your first encounter with long words, you pronounce them stressing the ‘next to the next to last’ syllable.
8. You wonder why the Pope crosses himself backwards when you see him on TV.
9. You wear comfortable shoes to church, because you know you’ll be standing a long, long time.
10. To you, a ‘topless’ gal is one without a headscarf.
11. You get great deals on Easter candy.
12. You spend time figuring out the best way to remove smoke stains from your ceiling and wax from your walls.
13. Before you pray, you say a prayer.
14. You don’t flinch when someone throws water at you.
15. When you first tell people who ask what religion you are, at first they think you’re Jewish. Oy!
16. You’re experienced at removing wax from clothing.
17. The service routinely starts at least 15 minutes late and lasts 2 ½ hours — and nobody around you complains.
18. You consider any service two hours or under short/regular.
19. know you’re in an Orthodox church when the priest says, “Let us complete our prayer to the Lord”, and there’s still half an hour to go.
20. At the end of Holy Week, you have rug burns on your forehead.
21. Your Easter isn’t Easter without an all-night party (featuring 10 dishes of sausage with cheese).
22. Your priest is married.
23. You have seen all members of clergy in purple robes.
24. You can differentiate between the eight different chanting tones.
25. You typically celebrate a feast day by observing strict fasting.
26. You celebrate feast days the night before.
27. You address the City as Constantinople instead of Istanbul .
28. You can say “Lord have mercy” 40 times without making a mistake.
29. You can say “Christ Is Risen”/”Indeed He Is Risen” in a million languages.
30. You have tournaments of red-egg-cracking on Pascha… And you usually know who’s being a wise-guy with the wooden one.
31. You have multiple priests’ numbers in your cell phone.
32. You actually read the Bible in your spare time.
33. You’ve slept overnight in your church for a retreat.
34. You’ve grown accustomed to the taste of wine because you’ve had it since you were a baby.
35. Even if you don’t speak the language fluently (i.e. Albanian, Greek, Russian, etc.) you could still carry on a decent conversation about food in it.
36. You’ve been or plan on going to Alaska .
37. You could write a book on the symbolism in an Orthodox wedding… during the wedding… because they are just that long.